Season 4, Episode 3: Facade

"Facade"

Episode 3

Air Date: October 6th, 2004

You know what surprises me re-watching this series again??? How shameless the plots of MANY episodes could be.  Case and point, I remember when Facade aired and being so confidently marketed as "Kryp-Tuck" by the WB because Nip Tuck was such a popular new show at the time, so why not make a damn near parody of plastic surgery with kryptonite??!  Yes, last episode, we had a T-1000 Jr. as a forgettable, guiltless villain while here we have an evil plastic surgeon mother who transforms her daughter into the most beautiful girl in school but there's only one catch: her kisses make people go crazy! O_O Fiction really has no bounds with this show.  Sometimes I wonder if stories like this would even make Smallville watchable now a days in the more comic book accurate shows of the CW like Supergirl and the Flash.  Sure, both shows had their share of stinkers, but could you imagine Barry or Kara having to deal with a overly beautiful teenager who makes her victims serotonin levels spike up exponentially that they see themselves as horrifying deformed in mirrors.  So if they don't look at a surface that has reflection they'd be fine.....right??? O_o

 Honestly, the only thing great about Abby and her beauty obsessed psycho of a mom is that too accurate flashback of the Season 1 era of the show with Clark and Lana looking exactly how they did with even Eric Johnson being brought back in a cameo as Whitney.  Seriously, terrific accuracy of how the show looked them compared to now right down to Lana's kryptonite necklace and Tom's painfully juvenile farm boy hair cut.  Of course, it's meant to set up Abby's story and how she would end up going to her mom 3 years later to finally live the high school love and adoration that she so rightfully desires.  But alas, this plot is dumb, this plot is dumb....oh did I mention, this plot is DUMB!!!! Nothing more to say about that! Let's get into some character development for Clark, who begins his ambition to play football again in this episode and actually makes the team.  Of course, Jonathan says absolutely not like he did back in "Hothead" but this time Clark is adamant about making his last year of high school memorable, maybe even glorious.  As always the scenes between father and son are beautifully acted by Tom and Jonathan; especially that finally scene where Jonathan throws Clark a long one after they both leave it up to Clark to be responsible now that he's a Varsity Football player! Yay! :)

Oh and Jason is the assistant coach, to conveniently be near Lana as she goes back to high school....ummmm, so Jason is at least a college age character while Lana is 17-18....so I'd say early 20s dating a possible minor, especially during scenes where they are stealing kisses in a school office is kind of creepy.  Even more hilarious, Jensen is actually a year younger than Tom yet Clark is suppose to be 17 and Jason 22-24 at least! Starting to feel like my instincts about Al and Miles being perverts might be true looking back on this show.  I guess I should appreciate the great chemistry between Lana and Jason, like their last scene where Lana confesses her insecurities about her own beauty before Jason tells her the beauty he sees isn't something you can see in a mirror."  Awwwwwwww....who are you kidding dude!!? O_o  I find the writers hilariously sad attempt at a moral message about unrealistic beauty expectations on teenage girls means nothing when it comes to inner beauty when you having lingering shots of Abby's sexy new look and practically a shower sex scene to draw in your teens viewers!  Anyway! o_O  Besides it was much more fun seeing Lois unofficially starting her career in journalism when she's forced to make up her last semester of her senior year at Smallville High.  

Oh the priceless reaction from Clark and Lois when General Lane drops that bomb on them! Ha! It definitely makes for more hilarious interactions as Lois oh so comfortably crossing boundaries when she is investigating for her first article at the Torch.  I love how Chloe is so laidback and cheerful about it, tho she was surprisingly mostly absent this episode in favor of Clark's story and Lois getting in the middle of Abby's kissing spree.....I just don't know what else to call it.  Not to mention, seeing Lois as the damsel in distress but managing to kick some serious a$$ as usual just shows the writers get this character far too well already! Besides that and Lex getting all suspicious when he inadvertently finds out Jason and Lana are dating (awkward!), Facade fails at its meteor freak main plot with the most absurd premise yet and the extremely lackluster preaching of inner beauty overcoming outer! At least Lois managed to change some lives with her first story and even Chloe is noticing the over welling chemistry between her cousin and best friend.  Oh boy, NOT that Chloe again I hope! O_O *Headdesk*

Final Kryptonite: C-