Season 2, Episode 9: Dichotic

"Dichotic"
Episode 9

Air Date: November 19th, 2002

"Mom, one of those boys from Home Improvement is on the show again!" Awwww remember in the 90s and early 2000s when JTT was the It Boy on the small screen???  Well, here's ole Jonathan Taylor playing a high schooler again and why am I not surprised that we open up with him in a workshop...literally!  Awwww Tim Allen would be so proud! :_) Sigh....hope you were entertained by all that because the rest of this review won't be too kind to this one! "Dichotic" is....how should I say, an irritating reminder of the lesser qualities of this show at this point.  The forced meteor freak threat of the week, more drowning the audience in the teenage melodrama of Clark, Lana and Chloe, not to mention Chloe herself having some of the most infuriating lines/scenes that once again highlight her terribly obsessive resentment of Clark, not to mention Lana.  Seriously, why would Chloe invite Lana to stay with her yet in this episode, Chloe treats Lana like her competition! O_O  Always bringing up Clark's love for her, her being second best to Lana, not good enough to compete with Lana in the eyes of other boys, etc.  Seriously, the whole Ian thing is more of a remember that these three have feelings for each other but are so passive aggressive about that it's like whats the point.  Jesus, even Dawson's Creek never went to these levels of absurd teen drama....or at least I don't think! Been a while since I've watched that teen phenomenon show, but I'll need more time to get to it after suffering through the high school years of this show.  Seriously, grow up! O_O

Even the last scene is atrocious with Chloe and Lana coming off even more harsh and selfish while apologizing to Clark while Clark chastising them for trusting Ian so quick and dismissing him like the jealous boyfriend.  While I'm glad Clark stood his ground and didn't take that crap from the two of them this time, what is with all this forced animosity??? Despite what Clark did in "Red", has been there for Lana waaaaayyyy more times than he's disappointed her and my god, stop with the bringing up of secrets and lies as a weapon to use against Clark to win an argument.  Not to mention, Clark has been there for Chloe and why would she dismiss Clark given he was right about Justin last season.  Even Chloe mentions how she's always attracted to meteor infected teen boys who seduce her and then try to kill her.  Sean, Justin, now Ian, and Clark was always there to protect and save her.  Look, I'm not saying they can't be apprehensive of Clark sometimes because of how he's always there to save them from these psychos with superpowers but Jesus, have some empathy and give him time to open up??? O_o Then again, teenagers!!! *Groan* Also....I'm sorry, Ian as a threat is laughable at best and forgettable at worst.  It's not even a case of evil twins, just some stuck up, egotistical sophomore who can make a duplicate of himself.  Not even make multiple clones of himself like say Multiple Man...just one other clone of himself.....WOW. O_O Clark dispatches him with little to no effort because it's a dumb power and no, just because this episode has a theme of people wanting two of them to getting their work load down and take care of all their responsibilities does not make up for it. -_-  Also, the way Clark saves Chloe is so dumb because last time I checked, that's not how physics work.  Yet I know this show is based on the Superman comics and weird, sci fi crap happens all the time but I don't think that's how falling works!  Unless it's because Clark is heavy but still nope, don't buy that! 0_0

Ehhhhh the rest of the episode for the first time feels just like it's filling up time.  The Kent drama this time isn't really that much of conflict and is rather an easy no brainer when after Jonathan gets hurt during a farming accident, Martha blames herself because of being too busy with her job as Lionel's assistant.  It raps up pretty quickly with Jonathan reassuring her it's not her fault and she should continue working her job with Lionel tho I feel Martha really did in fact think about how much her new job would take up so much of her time that'd she'd be neglecting her farm duties.  Seems bizarrely out of character for her and yes, it's a lesson for her to put her family first before her work but seems like she would have known this and done something about it sooner. Idk....just didn't care for the Kents and their problems this episode for the first time which is kinda sad when their usually the most reliable parts of a subpar episode. O_O  Then there's Lex and his apparent anger management problems.  Yeah, the meter maid assault with the golf club was.....once again, out of character. O_o  I was actually on the side of a meter maid.  Why even care???  Just an excuse to set up Lex for a new love interest in Dr. Bryce.  I admit, both Emmanuelle Vaugier and Micheal Rosenbaum has excellent chemistry but....just not invested in something that I could see on any ABC drama at the time instead of this.  But it will get better down the line as I remember.....  "Dichotic" is rather useless, with Ian being fairly redundant, useless villain with a motive that screams "vaguely psychotic overachiever" (Seriously, why is he so motivated to graduate so early and if he's a meteor freak, how did he get his lame power of "making two of me"....Ooooooo!? O_o Sometimes I think the writers get too invested in the teen angst and not enough in the more interesting possibilities of a town where meteor infected meta-humans can spring up at any moment! o_o)  This one just flat out failed on every level for me. Sorry. :(

Final Kryptonite: F